Many reflections today. Reflections on the past week, reflections on the coming week, reflections on some things I (thought I'd) left at home, reflections on the future.
This week has been an exciting on in many ways and in many ways I've accomplished less then in any other week so far this year. Why is there this inverse relationship between getting things DONE and getting things FIGURED OUT?
By saying that it would seem that I've taken grand steps toward understanding everything this last week. Unfortunately, no. But sometimes just living, doing new things, doing stupid things, doing fun things, doing questionable things, doing anything, is the best way to understand the world around me. Many life lessons learned this week, but more accurately, many life lessons half-learned this week. I can only hope that the coming weeks and months continue my education, because such lessons can only be learned with time.
And as always, I feel I've come out with at least as many questions as answers.
Being uncertain of my own thoughts, desires, and opinions is a position I know well. I can't say I'm quite comfortable here, but at least I know I will live to see another day. And another day will reveal a bit more to me of who I am, what the world is, and how I should live my part within it.
Sometimes living is the only way to learn this. And the only way to understand. So many times I get anxious to know more than my share, to understand more than my experience has taught me. At such times, I have to remind myself to be content with what I have been able to experience and comprehend so far. It is frustrating when I look at the future and attempt to fill in the missing puzzle pieces only to realize that I have to take more steps to discover them. But on the other hand, I enjoy searching for the missing pieces. Sometimes they are difficult to find and take many, many days, maybe even months and years. But the excitement when I discover a bit of truth, a bit of understanding, that I've been missing!
So maybe I haven't found many missing pieces this week. Maybe I've only found that they are missing. Then let the search begin. Again.
This week has been an exciting on in many ways and in many ways I've accomplished less then in any other week so far this year. Why is there this inverse relationship between getting things DONE and getting things FIGURED OUT?
By saying that it would seem that I've taken grand steps toward understanding everything this last week. Unfortunately, no. But sometimes just living, doing new things, doing stupid things, doing fun things, doing questionable things, doing anything, is the best way to understand the world around me. Many life lessons learned this week, but more accurately, many life lessons half-learned this week. I can only hope that the coming weeks and months continue my education, because such lessons can only be learned with time.
And as always, I feel I've come out with at least as many questions as answers.
Being uncertain of my own thoughts, desires, and opinions is a position I know well. I can't say I'm quite comfortable here, but at least I know I will live to see another day. And another day will reveal a bit more to me of who I am, what the world is, and how I should live my part within it.
Sometimes living is the only way to learn this. And the only way to understand. So many times I get anxious to know more than my share, to understand more than my experience has taught me. At such times, I have to remind myself to be content with what I have been able to experience and comprehend so far. It is frustrating when I look at the future and attempt to fill in the missing puzzle pieces only to realize that I have to take more steps to discover them. But on the other hand, I enjoy searching for the missing pieces. Sometimes they are difficult to find and take many, many days, maybe even months and years. But the excitement when I discover a bit of truth, a bit of understanding, that I've been missing!
So maybe I haven't found many missing pieces this week. Maybe I've only found that they are missing. Then let the search begin. Again.
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