No hablo Hanguk...o??

Here is an incomplete list of the worst times to NOT know the local language. From experience.

10. Meeting your friends' parents
Well, that was awkward. At least I'm not expected to say much.

9. Concerts and other performances/meetings
Now granted, most of these we choose to attend, but still - "Oh, was that funny?" "What did I just agree to?" "...can someone please tell me why we are clapping this time?"

8. Shopping
All I wanted was a toothbrush. But wait...what's the Korean word for "Toiletries"? Can I just say "Toothbrush imneeda"?? It was worth a try, but - no. Oh well, I guess it won't hurt me to just use mouthwash for a while. Until that runs out too...

7. Menus
Now I like most of the food I have eaten here, but still. When I walk into a restaurant I like to have some idea of my choices... More than once it was a random, "Uhh...*that* one..." *pointing vaguely at one portion of the menu* "Oh! *something fast in Korean*?" "Sure...I mean, 네..." Complete with an uncertain nod. It wasn't always good.

6. Taxis
You left your wallet at the dorm before a trip to Seoul? Haha -too bad! Hopefully that $30 will last for 3 days!
"Um, hey guys, does he even know where we wanted to go...?"

5. Prices
Did he really just charge me an extra 1000won because he didn't know where my dorm was and I had to tell him every turn??!"
"Wait...I'm pretty sure the sign said 800won, not 3000! Oh well, who needs lunch...right?"

4. Computers
Why yes, I purposefully printed 4 copies of this paper: 2 in black and white, 1 in color, and one with the completely wrong format!

3. Directions
Scenario One:
Me: "Myeongdeong station, right?"
윤재: "Yes."
...20 minutes later...
윤재: "Where are you??!"
Me: "Myeongdeong station...? In front of the UniQlo."
윤재: "Oh, you mean Myeongdong...ok. I'll be there in 10 minutes."
Me: Uhh.

Scenario Two:
Well...here I am. Standing in the middle of the 2nd biggest train station I've ever been in. My train leaves in 4 minutes. There are 16 platforms and more than one type of train per platform. Someone wanna help a cute foreigner? Anyone?? No? Oh that's ok, if I miss my train I'll just, you know - NEVER get to go to BUSAN!! AH!!!

Scenario Three:
Well, here I am. Wandering around the second biggest city in the world. It's about...1am. But hey, I know my hostel is around here somewhere, because I remember that one building was kind of close to it...

2. Being sick
준재: What, are you sick?
Me: ...yep!
준재: Did you go to the doctor??
Me: 준재, how could I go to the doctor - he wouldn't have any idea that I was saying...
준재: Ah... Well how about the pharmacy? Did you get medicine?
Me: Uh, well...no. I can't read the labels - I don't know what kind to get.
준재: Oh. That is a real problem. I think you must really be missing home now! It's really bad to be sick away from home.
Me: .......I KNOW! But thank you for caring.

1. New friends
Well, I said something in Korean, and he thought it was funny, so he answered. Maybe it was funny, maybe it wasn't - I'll never know.
She added me on Facebook, so now I can see all her Korean statuses. Cool.
It takes him about as long to think/write in Korean and translate it into English as it takes me to figure out how to make the simplest sentences in extremely broken Korean.

But it's worth it.